My thoughts and opinions on parenting, relationships and the stuff that makes up our minds, bodies and souls. Based in Brooklyn, NY.
Dec 5, 2010
Where is Your Sanctuary?
I recently opened an account with Visual Thesaurus which is the super cool tool available free of charge on Dictionary.com and Thesaurus.com. The tool gives you a visual on a word's DNA, so to speak, and when you love words as much as I do gives you a really cool way to find great synonyms. With the account you get the full benefits of the tool which allows to drill down on all the choices of synonyms and also includes the option to subscribe to Visual Thesaurus Magazine which emails a word of the day. On Thurs, Dec 2nd, the word of the day was sanctuary and I immediately asked myself where or what was my sanctuary. sanc·tu·ar·y, noun, 1. a sacred or holy place. 2. any place of refuge; asylum. Of the eight different meanings of the word found on Dictionary.com, I am focused on the second I've listed above, "any place of refuge" and a place of refuge is definitely something everyone needs. Everyone needs a place where they can feel at peace and they can just be themselves knowing there will be no judgement of them or their actions. Now this doesn't have to be a particular place. I believe sanctuary can be found in a person or thing as well and can also change and adapt, for instance, in times of desperation or extreme difficulty. So what's your sanctuary?
I find my sanctuary in my daughter's eyes. Sometimes when I'm feeling distraught all I have to do is look at her and when she looks back at me with those sweet eyes of hers, I'm at peace. Everything makes sense again and I have the strength to face any hurdle, obstacle or solve any complication I'm faced with. I also find that I'm at peace listening to music. I'm an avid listener to R&B and Soul music and keep Slacker Radio Plus going on my Blackberry and my radio station, ginger radio, going on Pandora when I'm at a PC. But lately, my true sanctuary has been when I'm working on anything for this blog or for ChuggyBear Entertainment. I can barely articulate the feelings of excitement, pride, joy and just overall excitement I experience when I'm writing, planning an event, working on the website, or coming up with ideas for marketing & promoting the businesses. I believe I've said it before, but there's nothing better than knowing that I'm using my skills and experience for my own means, my own goals, my own company! And nothing will top this feeling except for the day that I know I can do this 100% of the time.
So some of you may be wondering how a sanctuary and hard work could be synonymous but since working toward something is how I define my success and I've always loved any 9 to 5 job that challenged me, it makes perfect sense. Being pulled outside of my comfort zone, consistently challenging myself and holding myself accountable for goals that I've set, and watching my progress is awesome. Having a to do list where more than 50% of the actionables have to do with either business is exciting and was unfathomable to me prior to this year. I'm actually making my dreams come true. My dream to be a full-time writer, my dream to have a business that helps children by helping parents, my dream to have a career that allows me to spend more time with my daughter is all happening now. And, yes, I have bouts of fear from time to time; yes, I have doubts that I've made a mistake; and yes, when distractions rear their ugly head I lose focus momentarily. But nothing completely stops me because I've made the decision that this is now what defines me. I can't stop being me so there's no way to stop this train! And I know that if I didn't have this consecrated place, I'd still be lost. I'd still be looking for my identity, a way to define myself, a way to stop the pain from the emptiness I felt inside.
Finding my sanctuary saved my life, literally. If you don't know what or where yours is, you should reflect on the question and use the answer whenever you need that moment where you slow down the world and center yourself and emotional state. Whether it's by meditating, reading, taking an extra long shower or a nice long bath. Whether it be by taking a walk in the park, a bike ride, going for a run, or taking a drive, find what it is that gets you to that place. And once you find it, make it a goal to incorporate it into your routine preferably daily, but at the very least weekly. You'll find that by just acknowledging that you have a way to escape the madness and find yourself again will change your perspective when things start to get out of hand. And when you're in the middle of the muck and there seems to be no end in sight, your subconscious will remind you that you just need to seek your sanctuary.
Have fun searching for your place of shelter and remember, there can be several ways you get to that place so don't limit the possibilities. And share your comments here....there's no such thing as too many options when it comes to places of sanctuary so your way may be a new way for me or other reader to find peace.